5 Fictional Barbers That Have Become Household Icons

This week at CON MOTO HQ, we’ve been asking ourselves the question: if you could pick one of the world’s fictional barbers to cut your hair, who would it be and why (besides Edward Scissor hands)?So,after a great deal of heated debate,we created a list of our top five fictional barbers of all time.

We often talk about cutting-edge men’s hair stylists and world-class barbers as well as the things they do to give modern gents, like you, a tip-top mane to be proud of  - but to switch gears and offer you a little food for thought, let’s look at some of the most iconic barbers conjured up by pop culture.

We wonder if you agree with our list.

 

Figaro

“Figaro, figaro, figaro.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qHZkkgowdY

An iconic opera that was written by Gioachino Rossini, The Barber of Seville has been a tangible hit for centuries - and the most famous part of the entire piece is the part when the barber pipes up and sings the word, "Figaro, Figaro, Figaro" - something that's been used in many a film, sitcom and comedy sketch of the years. Imagine if you’re barber broke into this singalong when cutting your hair; you wouldn’t forget that in a hurry.

 

Enzo & Gino

"Hey who's your barber, eh? You tell the joke, I cut the hair." - Enzo, Seinfeld

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2A9vRjwfQY

These two fictional barbers are perhaps the most underrated cameo characters in the hit comedy Seinfeld, producing one of the most memorable moments of the entire show. These Edward Scissorhands-obsessed hair stylists made a single appearance on Seinfeld, but it was

gold as one of them kept giving Jerry a bad haircut and the other had to go behind his back to doctor his hair - a classic barbershop scene if ever we saw one.

 

Clarence & Sweets

"I'll be with you boys in a minute. He was badder than Cassius Clay, he was badder than Sugar Ray, and that new boy-what's his name? Mike Tyson?-looks like a bulldog..."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-R1h2Df3Nrc

The two most comical fictional barbers ever created, Clarence & Sweets were most likely based on many of Eddie Murphy's barbershop experiences while growing up in the Big Apple. This flawless double act is argumentative, obnoxious, hilarious and blatantly overcharge their customers for a one-snip haircut - two of the best characters in Coming to America for sure.

 

Bill Dauterive


"I made most of my life decisions at a Foghat concert ... I stand by them."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymYKTMhamsM

It could considered a stretch calling Bill from King of The Hill a traditional fictional barber, but technically, he’s a barber nonetheless - one of the military variety. As a barber for the army, Bill Dauterive has the power to give the perfect buzz cut, but he is also one of life’s lovable rogues. So, if you’re looking

for the best buzz cut in town coupled with top-notch oddball banter, Bill is the man your go-to guy.

 

Sweeney Todd


“Swing your razor wide! Sweeney, hold it to the skies! ”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omD3m-xwBWk

Yes, we couldn’t have a lineup of fictional barbers without including the bad old Demon Barber of Fleet Street, no sir. Okay, going to Mr Todd for a fresh shave or a shiny new pompadour could result in disaster - but if you’re looking for a skillful cut as well as a high-octane, adrenaline-pumping haircut, he’s your man. And if you talk him up, he might not use that trap chair on you, after all. Some of us didn’t want Sweeney Todd on the list, there’s little doubt that he’s one of the most iconic fictional barbers of all time - whether you agree with his hair styling techniques is an entirely different matter.

There you have it: our top five fictional barbers list. Do you agree or do you feel we should have included others that were overlooked? Do you have any suggestions of your own? Join in the debate by leaving a comment here.

 

Jason Speziale